Stressed!

Ok... so I haven't been updating my blog.

I'm lazy... and busy... and going more than a little crazy.

With school and life and everything!!! Makes me wanna SCREAM!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

That felt good.

Been staying back in school almost everyday now. Average time of homecoming, 11pm... Average time in school, 12hrs, Saturdays included. Yesterday was exceptional though. From 7am-1140pm. Haiz!!!

So I have been stressed up. Suddenly, I've got more work to do and not enough hours in the day to do it. To compound it, I've been feeling anger and a tinge of jealousy over some trivial things, (neither of which are emotions I experience a whole lot of...thankfully!). And realising how trivial, inconsequential and generally stupid the reasons are, I've been getting even angrier at myself.

So I take a deep breath and a step back. I've been told that that's a good way of getting your positivity- good qi- happy energy back. Did it work?

HELL NO!!

But I've got 4 things that do work sustaining me right now. The gym, my promise, lame jokes, and , most importantly, my friends.

I still go to the gym 4 times a week for an hour each. Light weights, compound sets, and good natured baiting and crapping with my kaki's... a good break from sitting down in that DARK hole of a room in front of the DAMN computer looking at the STUPID screen and going " OH SHIT! HANG!!!" every few hours . Which generally means redoing everything that I've done so far.

Promises made must be promises kept...even, or maybe especially, to oneself. Lets see if I can keep mine. I haven't been able to keep nearly as many as I would have liked. But I'll just have to keep trying. One day, I'd like to say "My word is my bond" and know that it really is. Its an ideal to live up to... one that I aspire towards.

Charachter... mine isn't nearly as good as I want it to be.

Lame jokes and friends. Both of which often go hand in mouth.

So it starts. There's nothing quite like bad jokes to relieve your stress (except maybe good ones...though I don't know any) and friends to tell them to. Friends who'll grimace and snort but still laugh... Cause we are all stressed... and stress does wierd things to people and their sense of humour... much like alcohol and its effect on attraction (or so I have been told...don't really drink.... you can stop rolling your eyes now ) My group of friends are probably pretty well known in the lecture. We are loud and noisy. We just talk soo much BULL its unbelievable.

But without them, I'd probably be gone. You need friends to keep your persepective. People whom you know will help you if you need it. People who will stay in the comp lab with you cursing, at the comp with you. Who will tell you lame jokes when you're out of anymore new ones to say. You might disagree with them, but hell, they're not perfect (and yes... I AM!... bleah).

But they are there. I know it. They know it. And thats all that matters.